What Could Go Wrong When Realtors Sponsor City Police Blotters

Written By: Robert Cox

Now HERE is how the police want to be covered by local media!

Not surprisingly the police blotter is one innocuous item after another.

We have to wonder whether our readers prefer we have our police blotter stories sponsored by local realtors, that start off by calls to support the police and promoting the local police charities?

Then our readers could get hard-hitting stories like these in Rye, NY.

“Caller reports an occupied van on Old Rye Beach Ave. Party collecting bottles. All in order.”

“Caller reports a wire hanging over the sidewalk”

“Caller reports that there is a large box that was delivered to her property currently blocking their door to enter into her home. He stated that this is not her property and can not read the label on the box. DISREGARD. PROPERTY REMOVED.”

“Caller reports skateboarder are doing jumps in front of Sotheby’s.”

“MVA with a deer.”

“Caller reports hitting the Yield sign at Fireman’s Circle.”

“Box Moving truck stuck under MTA bridge.”

“Caller from stated there is construction before 10 AM on Hill St.”

“Staff at Courtyard Marriott has a guest that is no longer welcome.”

“Caller states she locked her self in the basement. Needs assistance getting out.”

“Caller reported her child got stuck behind the toilet playing hide and seek.”

In Rye, the Realtors will tell you about a guy collecting cans at Playland Amusement Park or an Amazon box left at the wrong address, or kids skate boarding (in front of a competitor’s office) or a downed wire or gas leak. What you will not see is break-ins, DWIs, assaults or domestic violence incidents, drug arrests, or car thefts (of which there has been a rash). Nothing about a violation, no misdemeanors and heaven forbid, a felony complaint.

For those have seen the film “Hot Fuzz”, Rye comes off as the American-version of Sandford, Gloucestershire, a regular “Village of the Year” winner and MyRye.com as the Westchester version of the Sandford Citizen.

UPDATE 1/25: By contrast, here is the Rye Record police blotter, not sponsored by realtors. Police Blotter: 1/25 Stolen Car, Lost Trailer & Assault at Kelly’s. Complaints include Grand Larceny, Assault, Man relieving himself in the brook by Rye Nature Center, Two unknown men in driveway.